ｔｉｉｒ ｒｕｍｉｂｕｌ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
contemptibility) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fictionalized2012-08-18 12:46 am
contemptibility) wrote in fictionalized2012-08-18 12:46 am
fanfic; reason of birth
Title: Reason of Birth
Series: The Legend of the Legendary Heroes
Character(s): Tiir
Warnings: Tiir, who is still his own warning.
Summary: In the end, he's just another person.
Dedication: Toigiko!
Note: Themes taken from![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
31_days. Also, FEEEEEEEEELS.
—
Reason of Birth
—
1. my one preparation for the rich, noisy, and functioning madness
The world is cruel. A dark, despicable place, where their cries will reach no one. No stories need to be made about the cruelties of the world—not when reality fulfills that so neatly.
As far as Tiir’s concerned, the best way to deal with an enemy is straight on, and so he throws himself into reality with reckless vigour.
(And he knows that perhaps, compared to his friends, he is cruel—but if the world won’t show him any mercy, why should he show any in return?)
2. purveyors of magic and miracle
As an Iino Doue bearer, Tiir has survived countless things that would’ve killed anyone else ten times over.
One might worry over the psychological effects of being so regularly exposed to such pain and would-be fatal injuries, but it’s not the brush with the death that concerns Tiir.
It’s surviving that, at times, threatens to destroy him.
3. evil from within that has been let out
Call Tiir a monster, if you like, but to him, he’s just doing what he believes to be justified.
(The road to hell is paved with good intentions.)
4. doubt is useful for a while
Sometimes, it feels almost like if Tiir stopped believing—let go of all the beliefs that held him together—he would cease to exist.
And so, when he starts to doubt himself for the first time in Vatheon, it’s a bit of a surprise to wake up the next day, still alive—still there.
—Still worthless, but that was to be expected.
5. that measure of madness that moves life
He should never have been born. He knows that very, very well.
And yet, as badly as Tiir wishes that he’d never existed, he cherishes this life. The simple things, like the sight of the sun rising, the feel of wind against his face, the smell of the forest, his friends—they make everything so very worth the pain.
Perhaps it’s strange—crazy, even—to hate and love his life so much, but as far as Tiir’s concerned, it’s entirely normal.
6. Plan Number Six: Wage a War of Attrition
It’s like he told Yukari—if this fight can be called a war, then it’s a neverending one.
As long as there are humans, there will be God’s Eyes bearers. As long as there are God’s Eyes bearers, there must be humans.
It’s horribly ironic.
In the end, Tiir supposes, it might only end if everyone in the world ends up wiping one another out.
7. the vertical edges between light and shadow
Tiir knows that he will never have Ene’s charm. There will never be anything about him that draws people near, like the way that Ene’s presence alone seems to shine, despite her frailty.
For a second-in-command, there is nothing remarkable about him at all.
(He tries not to care.)
8. piqued, peeved, vexed, bothered, irked, annoyed - but not homicidal
Ryner called him a monster (and Tiir tried so hard not to let it hurt), Lieral taunted and stabbed him repeatedly (using magic no less, adding insult to injury), and Ene is in danger.
He couldn’t even kill the man he was born to defeat and Ryner chose now, of all times, to profess his love of worthless humans.
And the implication that he might desire coexistence—
Today has not been one of Tiir’s favourite days. It takes some effort to maintain civility towards his friends, who have done nothing to deserve his ire. At least they’re sharp enough to recognize that Tiir is in no mood to talk for once, and remain silent.
Tiir tries not to think about Ryner’s words, instead inwardly hoping for Ene to be all right.
—Most of all, he doesn’t want to consider the possibility that Ryner might be right.
9. finding nothing, no bait and no new idea
Tiir wakes up, moves out of his current apartment, and heads to the forest to get away from the humans.
It’s another day in Vatheon. Another day alone, because of course, the world would be cruel enough to bring him here but none of his friends.
Tiir wonders if this is what loneliness—the one thing he’d spent his life avoiding—feels like.
10. like an arrow entering my flesh
When death has practically been your next door neighbour for your entire life, it’s all too easy to be flippant about nearly dying.
Really, Tiir’s just impressed by the choice to use arrows and the attempt to enact a long-range fight. How clever.
11. joy and pain in equal measure
Lafra and Pueka are dead because of him. Six children are as well. People he would’ve given his life up for without a second thought, if it would’ve bought them enough time to escape.
Of course, though, he couldn’t even accomplish that much.
(This makes another slaughter to report, damn it.)
Though, Tiir supposes as he flees the scene with the two children, this is preferable to having every single one of them dead.
He doesn’t want to think about what would’ve happened had Ryner not been there.
12. more than a box full of icons
Tiir wants so badly to believe in a God—or rather, he knows some kind of divine being must exist, if only to supply the voice he hears. However, he shuns human religions, which cast his kind as demons, and instead substitutes them with his own beliefs.
God created them to be superior beings. That’s what he wants to believe.
(God is a fool, and this he knows.)
13. the nemesis of my digestive tract
The taste of blood never really leaves his mouth.
In a way, he supposes, humans found a way to taint him after all.
14. for a great unknown beyond the horizon
Tiir doesn’t know of the future. Not like Ene does, who keeps what she knows to herself and only divulges information when necessary.
It’s fine, though. Even without knowing what lies ahead, Tiir has hopes for the future—so many that sometimes they seem like impossibilities.
He has his dreams and his goals and his desires and he just hopes that he lives long enough to see at least one come true. In a world like this, that might be too much to ask for.
But he hopes anyway.
15. a drumbeat to which we must all march
Death is a part of life. Tiir knows this, knows it all too well—
Still, he vows, he will never accept his friends’ deaths as ‘inevitable’.
He refuses to accept that they were born solely to die.
Series: The Legend of the Legendary Heroes
Character(s): Tiir
Warnings: Tiir, who is still his own warning.
Summary: In the end, he's just another person.
Dedication: To
igiko!Note: Themes taken from
31_days. Also, FEEEEEEEEELS.1. my one preparation for the rich, noisy, and functioning madness
The world is cruel. A dark, despicable place, where their cries will reach no one. No stories need to be made about the cruelties of the world—not when reality fulfills that so neatly.
As far as Tiir’s concerned, the best way to deal with an enemy is straight on, and so he throws himself into reality with reckless vigour.
(And he knows that perhaps, compared to his friends, he is cruel—but if the world won’t show him any mercy, why should he show any in return?)
2. purveyors of magic and miracle
As an Iino Doue bearer, Tiir has survived countless things that would’ve killed anyone else ten times over.
One might worry over the psychological effects of being so regularly exposed to such pain and would-be fatal injuries, but it’s not the brush with the death that concerns Tiir.
It’s surviving that, at times, threatens to destroy him.
3. evil from within that has been let out
Call Tiir a monster, if you like, but to him, he’s just doing what he believes to be justified.
(The road to hell is paved with good intentions.)
4. doubt is useful for a while
Sometimes, it feels almost like if Tiir stopped believing—let go of all the beliefs that held him together—he would cease to exist.
And so, when he starts to doubt himself for the first time in Vatheon, it’s a bit of a surprise to wake up the next day, still alive—still there.
—Still worthless, but that was to be expected.
5. that measure of madness that moves life
He should never have been born. He knows that very, very well.
And yet, as badly as Tiir wishes that he’d never existed, he cherishes this life. The simple things, like the sight of the sun rising, the feel of wind against his face, the smell of the forest, his friends—they make everything so very worth the pain.
Perhaps it’s strange—crazy, even—to hate and love his life so much, but as far as Tiir’s concerned, it’s entirely normal.
6. Plan Number Six: Wage a War of Attrition
It’s like he told Yukari—if this fight can be called a war, then it’s a neverending one.
As long as there are humans, there will be God’s Eyes bearers. As long as there are God’s Eyes bearers, there must be humans.
It’s horribly ironic.
In the end, Tiir supposes, it might only end if everyone in the world ends up wiping one another out.
7. the vertical edges between light and shadow
Tiir knows that he will never have Ene’s charm. There will never be anything about him that draws people near, like the way that Ene’s presence alone seems to shine, despite her frailty.
For a second-in-command, there is nothing remarkable about him at all.
(He tries not to care.)
8. piqued, peeved, vexed, bothered, irked, annoyed - but not homicidal
Ryner called him a monster (and Tiir tried so hard not to let it hurt), Lieral taunted and stabbed him repeatedly (using magic no less, adding insult to injury), and Ene is in danger.
He couldn’t even kill the man he was born to defeat and Ryner chose now, of all times, to profess his love of worthless humans.
And the implication that he might desire coexistence—
Today has not been one of Tiir’s favourite days. It takes some effort to maintain civility towards his friends, who have done nothing to deserve his ire. At least they’re sharp enough to recognize that Tiir is in no mood to talk for once, and remain silent.
Tiir tries not to think about Ryner’s words, instead inwardly hoping for Ene to be all right.
—Most of all, he doesn’t want to consider the possibility that Ryner might be right.
9. finding nothing, no bait and no new idea
Tiir wakes up, moves out of his current apartment, and heads to the forest to get away from the humans.
It’s another day in Vatheon. Another day alone, because of course, the world would be cruel enough to bring him here but none of his friends.
Tiir wonders if this is what loneliness—the one thing he’d spent his life avoiding—feels like.
10. like an arrow entering my flesh
When death has practically been your next door neighbour for your entire life, it’s all too easy to be flippant about nearly dying.
Really, Tiir’s just impressed by the choice to use arrows and the attempt to enact a long-range fight. How clever.
11. joy and pain in equal measure
Lafra and Pueka are dead because of him. Six children are as well. People he would’ve given his life up for without a second thought, if it would’ve bought them enough time to escape.
Of course, though, he couldn’t even accomplish that much.
(This makes another slaughter to report, damn it.)
Though, Tiir supposes as he flees the scene with the two children, this is preferable to having every single one of them dead.
He doesn’t want to think about what would’ve happened had Ryner not been there.
12. more than a box full of icons
Tiir wants so badly to believe in a God—or rather, he knows some kind of divine being must exist, if only to supply the voice he hears. However, he shuns human religions, which cast his kind as demons, and instead substitutes them with his own beliefs.
God created them to be superior beings. That’s what he wants to believe.
(God is a fool, and this he knows.)
13. the nemesis of my digestive tract
The taste of blood never really leaves his mouth.
In a way, he supposes, humans found a way to taint him after all.
14. for a great unknown beyond the horizon
Tiir doesn’t know of the future. Not like Ene does, who keeps what she knows to herself and only divulges information when necessary.
It’s fine, though. Even without knowing what lies ahead, Tiir has hopes for the future—so many that sometimes they seem like impossibilities.
He has his dreams and his goals and his desires and he just hopes that he lives long enough to see at least one come true. In a world like this, that might be too much to ask for.
But he hopes anyway.
15. a drumbeat to which we must all march
Death is a part of life. Tiir knows this, knows it all too well—
Still, he vows, he will never accept his friends’ deaths as ‘inevitable’.
He refuses to accept that they were born solely to die.